Citizens Neutralized, Dictator Kerver Takes Power

It turns out that Carver Kerver's plans were very different from what we originally thought they were. He has been waiting patiently in the woods for a very long time for the perfect opportunity to take power.

Gordon Gordon finally perfected a device that will allow Dictator Kerver to speak real English, and it turns out that Kerver is actually a genius in most subjects (except for palm trees and soap making).

Kerver used the current Klop Froth outbreak to his advantage by offering a free vaccine to any citizens of Ghumada (and also Big Bob, who surprisingly did not show up). However, what the citizens didn't know was that there was no outbreak, he made it all up! Furthermore, the vaccine wasn't a vaccine, it was a special blend of chemicals created by Gordon Gordon. It was believed to contain several common substances such as nitrous oxide, diacetylmorphine, methylenedioxymethamphetamine, and candle wax. Citizens are now required to inject this special blend twice a day, and they don't seem to mind too much. This has caused the riots to settle down at least 100%, except for Crunchy Ken, who was exiled to the Land of Misery to dig drainage pipes for the rest of eternity. The Land of Misery now contains a total of 4,000,000 drainage pipes, although that is just an estimate because no one really wants to count drainage pipes in the Land of Misery.

Pope Frosty Antelope Supreme Dong VIIIIIIIVIIIIIIIXX will remain a religious consultant for now, although he has no influence when it comes to political decisions anymore.

Dictator Kerver's revised higharchy chart 

There is still no sign of President Jaquan.